Love & Hate, By M.Neill

Recently, somebody told me that they hated their job. I asked them why, and they started to tell me all the reasons why they hated the job.

I told them that wasn’t my question. It was actually: Why would you want to hate the job? And they said they didn’t WANT to hate the job – they just did.

But it doesn’t work that way. What makes us hate something is that we think hateful thoughts about it. It’s us, it’s not the job.

Somebody else can be in the exact same job, not hating it. Sometimes you’re in the exact same job, not hating it. Hate is not a property of a job. It’s a habit of thought.

Often, it’s a habit that we get into because we think it will motivate us to change, not seeing that what it actually means is that we marinate in hate. That icky feeling starts to contaminate everything in our world; we’re exhausted and we have no energy to even contemplate change, let alone doing anything different.

What if you could love something and leave it? What if you could love something and move on to something else? What if you loved something simply because it’s easier? It’s nicer. It’s less effort than hating it. It’s less tiring than hating it.
What if you let yourself be in love with everything? It’s certainly possible.

Now, again, I am not saying you need to do this, you should do this. It’s not a prescription.

What I’m actually saying is that love and hate are qualities of mind, not qualities of the universe. And love is permanent. Love is the default. Love does not come and go. Thought comes and goes.

Hate is made of thought.

And life is made of love.

So, if you want to love more, you’re in luck; you’re made of it. If you want to heal, you’re in luck; you’re already whole.

You just think you’re not.